Titans #1

This is apparently the second half of the “Titans East” story from waaaaay back in November. Someone is attacking all current and former Teen Titans, including the current team, Nightwing, Starfire, Flash, Donna Troy, Beast Boy, Raven, and Red Arrow. There’s cheesecake for both guys and girls, as multiple characters get attacked in the buff. In the end, everyone gets out okay, finds out that most of the Titans East team didn’t get killed, just horribly, horribly wounded, and figure out who’s behind the attacks — of course, it’s a long-time Titans villain…

Verdict: Thumbs up. I’ve got plenty of quibbles. First, at this point, I don’t trust writer Judd Winick much at all. The dude’s got some weird addiction to randomly killing characters. Second, penciller Ian Churchill is a bit of an acquired taste. I didn’t really mind his artwork in this issue, but dangit, he’s sometimes shown tendencies toward Ed Benes/Michael Turnerisms, with cookie-cutter faces and plastic bodies. He’s at least good with action and facial expressions, and his monsters are pretty good, too. I’m gonna give it at least a few issues.

The Goon #23

The Goon and his various allies start mobilizing to find out what’s up with the local zombie population. Pub owner Norton is getting married to a gypsy so she’ll help him get revenge for the death of his mother — but the magic forces at work may be far too powerful for her to deal with. Lounge singer Mirna gets scared out of town by the reappearance of her dead brother, who also animates a giant body of sticks. We’re also treated to the brilliant line “Back off, youse mugs! I swiped this here salmon and I’m gettin’ the squeezin’s!” All that, plus creator Eric Powell is sponsoring a roller derby team! Huzzah!

Verdict: Thumbs up. Oh, Goon, how did I ever live without youse in my life?

Abe Sapien #3

More trouble for Abe, Hellboy’s amphibious pal. He gets chased by ghosts, giant snakes, and malign crows, and his only ally is a dead lady.

Verdict: Honestly, thumbs down. This issue felt like Mignola was padding his page-count to stretch a four-issue miniseries to five. Some nice fighting here and there, but all but about six or seven pages didn’t feel necessary to the story.

 

The Goon #22

There’s a new Zombie Priest in town, and he’s got the zombies givin’ the old Zombie Priest the bizness. He’s also got some bad news in store for the rest of town, too. More of the more docile zombies around town are starting to go bad — and I don’t mean smelly — and Momma Norton, the crazy gypsy mother of the local pub owner, is gunned down, possibly by Labrazio, a guy who the Goon killed years ago. But if it’s not Labrazio, who’s behind the killing? What will Norton do to get revenge? Will the Goon get to beat anyone to pieces with a shovel before the end of this?

Verdict: Thumbs up. Not quite as much riotously funny stuff as in previous issues. This is really a dead serious story, with lots of emotion, from Momma Norton’s bloody prediction of death to Norton’s complete sorrow over his momma’s passing. Even the Goon is deeply affected by all this — he cries twice, whether from sadness for Momma Norton or his own tortured past with Labrazio. It’s easy to forget that this is a horror comic, what with all the crazy, funny stuff that happens here, but it’s clear that some truly horrific stuff is on the way.

 

Justice League of America #19

The Justice League heads out to the prison planet where the government has been stashing supervillains (in the “Salvation Run” series). They take along Rick Flag, a government agent who helped put the villains away. Unfortunately, when they finally arrive at the planet the government has been sending everyone to, they find it deserted, except for a few illusions of supervillains. They are taken prisoner by strange glowing tentacles of energy that only Hawkgirl is able to escape from. It turns out that their captor is the mostly useless space-tyrant Kanjar Ro, and he reveals that the villains’ teleport beams were intercepted by teleport beams from… somewhere else… before they arrived here. After that, the heroes escape and, um, I guess they go back home.

Verdict: Thumbs down. So much awfulness. Kanjar Ro? What, was Crazy Quilt not available? And he uses energy “drawn from the fabric of space-time” that just happens to be weakened by Hawkgirl’s all-purpose “Nth Element?” Isn’t that fairly stupidly convenient? And finally, I’m just completely sick to death of Ed Benes’ plastic, Michael-Turneresque penciling.

 

The Flash #238

Flash and his family are having money troubles — Wally can’t get a job, and being a superhero doesn’t really pay very well. There’s a new supervillain in town called Spin who can turn people’s fears real — he actually causes an earthquake by latching onto people’s fears of an earlier quake. And when Flash gets caught on camera complaining about his money woes, the media launches the soundbite into a major scandal. And when Wally goes after Spin, the villain manages to use his power to turn people’s fears about Flash selling out into reality.

Verdict: Thumbs up, more or less. Spin is, honestly, a fairly lame villain, but I liked the way they introduced Wally’s money troubles. One of the things that’s always bugged me about superheroes is that most of them, as written, should be unable to keep a job and just a shade above abject poverty anyway. So it’s not at all bad, but Spin is just a lousy villain.

 

Green Lantern Corps #21

This issue focuses on Boodikka, former mercenary from the planet Bellatrix, former hotheaded Green Lantern, and current emotionless Alpha Lantern. We get a small hint of her new powers, as she shuts down the programming on a whole herd of Manhunter robots, and we also get a glimpse into her past. For the most part, it’s all a lead-up to the cliffhanger, where she runs into the bounty hunters she used to run with, including her sister, who’s one of the newest Green Lanterns.

Verdict: Thumbs down, I think. The problem with emotionless characters is that it’s awfully hard for readers to get interested in them.

 

The Goon #21

The Goon’s old foe, the Zombie Priest, is confronted by a new zombie priest from out of town. Basically, the old Zombie Priest is in trouble, and this new, more competent zombie priest plans to take things over and take care of the Goon once and for all. Speaking of the Goon, he’s busy losing his dynamite stash to a bunch of street urchins and fighting the world’s largest transvestite. As for Franky, he has a very happy dream about a Velveteen Horsey, which unfortunately ends with a bear. And at the end of the comic, creator Eric Powell shares the joyous news with everyone that he’s officially sponsoring a cage fighter. Cage fighters are apparently really good at kicking people in the head, choking everyone who gets close, and pushing their sponsors in the swing.

Verdict: With colossal transvestites, Velveteen Horseys, and cage fighters, how could this be anything other than an enthusiastic Thumbs Up?

 

The Goon #20

Why didn’t anyone ever tell me about “The Goon” before? I should’ve been reading this years ago!

Background? The Goon is a big tough guy who beats the snot out of monsters from time to time. Franky is his buddy, and he has Little Orphan Annie eyes. Honestly, I think that’s all the background you really need.

Our story this time? Well, we got a moron named Ralph, and he gets eaten by monsters. His mother asks the Goon and Franky to find him, and they go looking in the burlesque house where he was last seen. After the Goon beats up a gorilla, they discover the monsters — a couple of harpies who the Goon had previously destroyed. Also, an undead magician who whines about how much pain he’s in. After this, there is a great deal of fighting.

This is classified as a horror comic, but the monsters here are awfully mild. Honestly, the entire focus of the book is humor. And this is a very funny book. I counted about a dozen gut-buster laughs in 22 pages, which is a mighty good average for any comic book.

And since so much of the story is set in a burlesque house, creator Eric Powell got to do a lot of research and interviews with burlesque performers, which he shares in the letter column. So hey, burlesque!

Verdict: Thumbs up. Seriously, this is such an utterly fun comic. I’m still madder’n heck that I missed out on it for so long.