Another dreary week in another dreary month. Keeps going on an on and on like a poison. You want the antidote? Then step up for 500cc’s of FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

These don’t always have to be complicated ballets of violence and pain. Sometimes, all you need is a single panel from February 1998’s New Year’s Evil: Body Doubles #1 by Dan Abnett, Andy Lanning, Joe Phillips, and Jasen Rodriguez, as Carmen Leno plays knuckle-hockey with the bridge of Merlyn’s nose.

If that don’t get you ready for the weekend, you got worse problems than I can fix…

UPDATE: How embarrassing! Crisis on Earth-Prime spotlighted the same fight as I did! That’s like showing up at the dance wearing the same dress as someone else! Um, I mean, that’s what I hear! Not that I’d know first-hand or anything…

It’s been one of those weeks again. Nothing but bad news all around us, the holidays are over, everyone’s either back at the office or wishing they had an office to go back to, and we don’t have anything to look forward to but dreary, icy, miserable January. Is there any way to get perked back up in time for the weekend? Of course! It’s time for FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Tonight’s fightfest comes from June 2005’s Flaming Carrot Comics #3 by Bob Burden, as Earth’s greatest hero, the Flaming Carrot, faces the robotic, magnetic terror of Magnatron!

And all hail Spacebooger, the Master of Friday Night Fights!

For the first Friday Night Fights of 2009, I’m pulling out all the stops. From 2005’s Bizarro World anthology, here’s the big fight between Wonder Woman and Supergirl from “Super-Dumped” by Johnny Ryan and Dave Cooper.

Not sure that’s technically an “epic,” but it’s sure got all the violence you’ll need this weekend.

Peace on earth and goodwill towards men?! I think we’ve had quite enough of that by now. It’s definitely time to jump back in, with fists flying and bones cracking, for FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Tonight, we’re heading back to May of 2000 for JSA #10 by David Goyer, Geoff Johns, Stephen Sadowski, and Michael Bair, for a quick round of fisticuffs between Ted “Wildcat” Grant and Killer Wasp.

Man, am I glad I realized it was Boxing Day. I’d hate to let a pun that awesome go uncommemorated…

Tonight’s edition of Friday Night Fights comes to us from the story “Fear in Philadelphia” in February 1977’s Shazam! #27 by E. Nelson Bridwell, Kurt Schaffenberger, and Vince Colletta. It pits Captain Marvel against four generic thugs. Is there any way for the Big Red Cheese to prevail against such overwhelming odds?

Ahh, cartoonish, over-the-top violence, is there anything you can’t accomplish?

It’s been another rough-and-tumble week, and what we all need to get us eased into the weekend is a stiff shot of brutally violent, extra-violent, extremely violent violence! Time to kick it hardcore! ‘Cause it’s time for FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Tonight’s punishing platter of pain comes courtesy of E. Nelson Bridwell and Bob Oksner in “Secret of the Smiling Swordsman” from August 1975’s Shazam! #19:

Uhh. That’s… That’s… Dangit, that’s kinda bizarre, ya know?

Pffh. Man, I’m not sure this is appropriate for a family audience. Am I gonna get arrested for this?

Okay, okay, I can’t resist. “Why does she laugh at my mighty sword? Were my parry and thrust not impressive enough? Could all that random poking have caused damage to my previously impressive sabre?”

“Zounds! Her riposte has damaged my epee!”

No one touchés Spacebooger’s inquartata!

Another Friday, another pointlessly violent interlude of pain and suffering. But enough about your typical workday — it’s time again for FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Our superpowered brawl tonight comes courtesy of the Elongated Man in January 1965’s Detective Comics #335, in the story “Break Up the Bottleneck Gang!” by the great Gardner Fox, also-great Carmine Infantino, and the great-but-not-as-well-known-as-Fox-and-Infantino Sid Greene:

Spacebooger spins you right round, baby, right round.

Another Friday means it’s time for another session of comic-art pain to kick off the weekend! Everyone strap yourself in for… FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Our weekly dose of ultraviolence comes tonight from the 2005 anthology Bizarro World and a story by Evan Dorkin and M. Wartella called “Monkey, the Monkey Wonder.” Here we see the inevitable result when Beppo the Super-Monkey catches Batman trying to do away with his new monkey sidekick.

My mon Spacebooger don’t shiv.

I don’t know about you, but after a week as wild, wooly, wacky, and, um, wabash-cannonballesque as this one, I needs me a little dose of violence to get the weekend started right. So let’s get going — it’s time for FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Tonight, our whuppin’ comes courtesy of this year’s Atomic Robo: Dogs of War #3 by Brian Clevinger and Scott Wegener.

The only thing better than beating Nazis bloody is robots beating Nazis bloody.

When Bahlactus called an end to Friday Night Fights, I expected that someone would eventually bring it back, but I wasn’t expecting it to make its return so soon. But Spacebooger has already jumped forward to make sure the comics blogosphere’s greatest and most brutal tradition continues.

But enough of the preamble: Let’s get going with the All-New, All-Different FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

From Amazing Spider-Man #573 from just a few weeks ago, by Mark Waid, Patrick Olliffe, and Serge LaPointe, Spidey takes on a bank-robbing villain named the Grizzly, with running commentary from Stephen Colbert:

Bear-fighting, the Wall Crawler, and a fake TV pundit — not a bad way to bring FNF back into action…