Another week gone by, another weekend ready to start. You roused up enough for it? No, I don’t think you are roused up enough for this weekend. You need one little boost to get you ready. You need one little bottlerocket shoved under your tailbone. You need a big, thick steamin’ bowl of FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

And if tonight’s battle don’t get you roused up for action and mayhem, then it ain’t even possible to rouse you anymore. From September 2008’s Hellboy: The Crooked Man #3 by Mike Mignola and Richard Corben: Hellboy hits a diabolical spirit called the Crooked Man with… a consecrated shovel!

Our musical accompaniment for tonight? I had some trouble with it — couldn’t find any lyrics at all having to do with consecrated shovels, and that was really the big sticking point. You’d think that, at some point, some ambitious death metal band, or maybe Elvis, woulda written a song about hitting monsters with a consecrated shovel, but I guess not.

Finally, I was just looking at the panels, and it just came to me. Any time you need to convey, through music, what it’s like when a reformed, angst-ridden demon hits a misshapen, top-hatted monstrosity with a holy consecrated shovel so hard that everything EXPLODES… you must, absolutely must, dial up Marvin Lee Aday to provide the soundtrack.

Turn it up loud, and have a great weekend.

It’s the end of yet another way-too-long week, and we all need a little chaos and pain to get our weekend started. Ideally, of course, the chaos and pain would come from starting our own real-world fights with various ill-mannered ruffians, but that could lead to unsightly bruising and being beat to death with pool cues, so instead we turn, as always, to comic books and FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

This week, let’s take a look at January 2008’s Green Lantern #25 by Geoff Johns, Ivan Reis, and Ethan Van Sciver, in which Superboy-Prime blasts his way through the Anti-Monitor’s chest:

Our appropriately-themed musical selection for the night should be easy enough — ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Pat Benatar!

Time for a new 12-round series of Friday Night Fights, and Spacebooger has a new theme and set of rules that I’m not real thrilled with — music lyrics. The rule is that I’m supposed to tie my panels of punishing pugilism to a song title or lyric. Well, great, but I’ve got a lousy memory for song titles and even worse for song lyrics. I really doubt I’d be able to consistently come up with songs that match the fights… so I’m gonna go ahead and plan on breaking the rules as often as I need to. Like, for example, today.

So here we’ve got a panel from January 2008’s The Goon #20 by Eric Powell, in which the Goon punches some oversized doofus across the chops:

So I wracked my brain trying to come up with a song to match up with that. I can’t find any lyrics for “Dude, I punched some guy who was taller than me” or “Lookit those teeth fly”. The closest I could come up with was that old kids’ song “Little Bunny Foo Foo,” but the bit where the Good Fairy saying “If you don’t behave, I’ll turn you into a GOON” isn’t even sung, it’s just spoken.

So instead of specific lyrics, let’s just hit the trailer for the upcoming “Dethklok vs. the Goon” one-shot. It’s about the Goon, and it certainly includes music by Dethklok, the most brutal death metal band ever. So I’m calling it a win. Huzzah!

QUICK UPDATE: Hey, I just realized that the music played at the end of the “Dethklok vs. the Goon” trailer is Dethklok’s “Face Fisted” — which actually appears to conform to Spacebooger’s rules. Nevertheless, I’m still declaring this to be a rule-breaker, just to emphasize that I’ll be breaking that rule pretty often, and that none of youse sorry mugs is tough enough to stop me.

Spacebooger has still declared us to be in the hiatus fortnight for Friday Night Fights, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get a little proper brawling in before the weekend, right? Sure, we had some trouble with not being able to get any actual violence in last week, but I got that solved — we’re going with something from January 2008’s The Goon #20 by Eric Powell. It’s the roughenest, toughenest, rootinest, tootinest scrap-happy comic there is, so I’m sure there’s gotta be something terrifically brutal in here.

Wha?

No, wait, I mean, wha?

Alright, that did severe violence to my brain. That counts, doesn’t it?

Y’all have a merry weekend, despite the lack of fisticuffs.

Dangit, now I want a ham sandwich…

Okay, so Spacebooger has decreed that we’re taking a two-week break from Friday Night Fights, but that doesn’t mean that we actually have to stop the violence, right? After all, it’s been a rough week, and what we all need is a heaping mega-dose of pain and suffering and fisticuffs to make sure the weekend gets started off right! So let’s get right to the Pure Testosterone-Pumped Bone-Breakage!

From April 2008’s, umm, Tiny Titans #1 by Art Baltazar and Franco: Witness the heart-stopping brutality as Plasmus encounters a bunch of the Titans in a local park:

OHHH, THE SAVAGERY!

Well, alright, not so much the pain this time. But I think we can excuse it for once, because we all love lollipops. Y’all have a merry weekend…

Another long work-week has passed, and it’s time once again for that time we all love the most: FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Tonight, we’re going all the way back to May 1939 for Detective Comics #27, by Bill Finger and Bob Kane. In the first appearance of the Dark Knight, Batman slugs murderous industrialist Alfred Stryker in the jaw, knocking him into a vat of acid…

SOCK!

That artwork was actually taken from a collection called Batman in the Forties. No, I don’t actually own the first appearance of Batman — if I did, I doubt I’d be so worried about job-hunting…

If I haven’t mentioned it before, this has been a heck of a week. So let’s just get straight to what we all came here for: FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

From March 1985, here’s Action Comics #565 by Keith Giffen, Robert Loren Fleming, and Bob Oksner, in which Superman ejects Ambush Bug from the Fortress of Solitude:

And that’s that. This week’s been so busy, I’m gonna go grab a little early shut-eye, for once. Y’all don’t forget the Lubbock Comic Book Expo, tomorrow at the Civic Center!

It’s been one heck of a week. If I ain’t mentioned it before, I’m in the midst of moving. No, haven’t gotten a job yet. (Starting to doubt that’s ever going to happen) I’m moving into my brother’s spare apartment here in Lubbock. I won’t be paying $600+ every month in rent, though I’ll still be paying a ton for various bills. Anyway, we’ve had family in town all week long trying to get the apartment liveable and trying to get all my stuff moved over. We aren’t done yet, not anywhere close. So there’s been the stress of moving, combined with the stress of doing prep work for the Comic Book Expo. I’m worn plumb out, and the weekend won’t be much of a break — I’ve still got lots of stuff to pack and move. But if I can’t have a proper weekend, I can at least have a proper dose of FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Today’s bit of brutality comes from June 1971’s Amazing Spider-Man #97 by Stan Lee and Gil Kane, as Peter Parker smacks a drug pusher around.

Remember, kids, don’t do drugs, or some radioactive spider-powered nerd is going to ZOMP you good.

It’s the end of another rough-and-tumble week, and we all need a nice dose of the weekend to help us unwind. And what’s the best way to start the weekend? A heaping bowl of mindless violence and, as always, FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

This week’s brawl comes from July 1971’s Fantastic Four #112 by Stan Lee, John Buscema, and Joe Sinnott:

If there are two poster boys for rambunctious comic violence, it’s gotta be those two brawling beauties, the Thing and the Hulk.

It’s been another crazy week — and an unusually busy one for me — so it’s time we all got to blow off some steam with some weekend relaxation — and as always, a quick dose of FRIDAY NIGHT FIGHTS!

Today, we’re going all the way back to October 1941 in Captain America Comics #7 (reprinted in last week’s Captain America Comics Special #1) by the great Jack “King” Kirby and the almost-equally-great Joe Simon. Here, we see Captain America planting his star-spangled fist somewhere about halfway through the skull of one of the Toad’s goons.

That’s violence that’ll get you to stand up and salute.